Latest posts
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A Tale of Two Directions
Do you ever feel that you can physically feel yourself making space for a new, potentially life-changing concept or possibility? It’s a mental thing, but I can almost feel my chest expanding, trying to fathom this new idea that is not yet attached to a trustworthy emotion. This happens quite often lately but this weekend, I took…
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Work Ethics (or A Necessary Mess)
I sit at the kitchen table. Maki has already left for school and I’ve had one cup of coffee. I’ll get the little one up in a bit so she can get ready for her late-owl start time. After that, I’ll drive the 45 minutes north to Costa Mesa for another round of dialysis.…
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I Got You Babe
They say we’re young and we don’t know We won’t find out until we grow Well I don’t know if all that’s true ‘Cause you got me, and baby I got you Babe I got you babe I got you babe They say our love won’t pay the rent Before it’s earned, our money’s…
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The Detour
A couple of hours after I posted the previous blog, just as I was leaving to pick up Justine from Kindergarten, I got a call from a nurse at Mesa Verde. She sounded slightly confused herself as she told me that the ambulance company had just called to inform her that Vernon was being transported from dialysis…
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Pendulum Swing
“My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada.” —Ellen DeGeneres “It’s a roller-coaster, isn’t it?” This is a common response I get after telling someone how Vernon is doing. We usually shake our heads and sigh in agreement. But a month…
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The Circus
With all the world-shaking tragedies in Paris over the weekend, it felt wrong to sit down and journal our little life here without taking pause. I wrote a lot of words last night, hoping to process some thoughts. But they just ended up as words, nothing helpful except for perhaps organizing some emotions for myself,…
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Save the Date
So…we’ve decided to put on a second-annual holiday art-fair fundraiser next month. I’d booked the date in advance, but I hadn’t had space in my head to start organizing it until this weekend. It may be a little crazy to pull something off at such short notice, but I think that’s more or less what we did last…
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The Dream of a Donation
“Is Vernon eligible for a kidney transplant?” This is how Joe greeted me yesterday. “I think so. I’ve been told he should be…down the line. Once and if he is stable enough. But yeah, I think so…maybe.” “Why can’t I donate?” “I don’t know, Joe. I guess you have to be a match, but I don’t…
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The Power of “NO”
One year ago, Vernon was moved to Newport Subacute. There had been many attempts to get him into more desirable facilities, but in the end, this is what he got. As Justine learned in Preschool: “You get what you get, and you don’t throw a fit!” I didn’t throw a fit, but I spent the next…
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Superheroes
Yesterday was the best Mesa Verde- Sunday in a long time, especially for Maki, who hadn’t had a decent conversation with his dad in at least a year. Despite Vernon’s complaints about constant pain in his right leg (our next area of attention?) he sat upright at the table for over an hour, talking with…